The Profoundness of the Guru’s Teachings

I was born in Casablanca, Morocco. I grew up in a Muslim family, in a very spiritual atmosphere. My father followed the Sufi path and he used to tell me this Sufi saying: A great being nourishes, sustains, and protects the world by his or her own presence and perfect love. As a child I cherished this saying and kept it close to my heart. I focused on these two words: nourishes and protects. I remembered them often, especially when I was scared or going through a difficult time.
I first came across the Siddha Yoga path in 1983, when I was a medical student at the University of Bordeaux, in France. The year before that I had begun to feel a burning desire to know God. It was a hunger: I wanted to be spiritually nourished. This longing made me very aware that I needed someone who had fully mastered the subject, someone who could teach me in a clear and specific way how to know God.
In February 1983, after participating in a conference about Siddha Yoga meditation held at my university, I knew I had found my Master: Gurumayi Chidvilasananda.
In the years that followed, I experienced tremendous grace in studying Gurumayi’s teachings. I remember spending evenings after class reading Siddha Yoga books, and they truly fed me and gave me all that I needed; I felt nourished. The teachings helped me come closer to my goal of knowing God. And they helped me build a strong relationship with Gurumayi.
My relationship with Gurumayi deepened over those early years. Then, in 1987 in Paris, I attended my first satsang with Gurumayi, when she was on a Teachings Visit in Europe. What I remember most about receiving Gurumayi’s darshan that day was the joy and happy tears that came up so naturally. After receiving Gurumayi’s darshan, I became very involved in offering seva in the Siddha Yoga Meditation Center in Bordeaux, especially in the satsangs and the broadcast Shaktipat Intensives.
For many summers I visited Shree Muktananda Ashram with other Siddha Yogis from France to participate in center leader trainings and other courses. Although the visits during my summer vacation time were very short, they were incredible. During the rest of the year, since I lived in France, there was a geographic distance between my Guru and me. It did not matter, though—Gurumayi’s teachings brought her close to me.
Then, in 2001, as I went about my busy life with a big patient list and a successful clinic, I began to notice a shift within my being. By this point it had been a few years since I had seen Gurumayi in person. When I focused on this inner shift, I recognized it as a strong desire to have Gurumayi’s darshan once again, and to be in her physical presence. I started thinking of her and missing her a lot. This longing had a quality of both sweetness and burning desire—and it was constant.
This yearning to be near Gurumayi continued—until one night when I had a dream of Gurumayi. In the dream, I was in a big meditation hall. I was all by myself, sitting on the floor, facing the pictures of the Siddha Yoga Gurus on the puja. I was praying intensely to Gurumayi, when a door on the side of the hall opened, and there she was! Gurumayi walked in—silent, majestic, radiant, and surrounded by a magnificent golden light. I felt overwhelmed by the power of her presence. When she reached my seat, she stopped. I could feel the waves of her shakti so strongly that I couldn’t even look up at her. I kept my eyes on her feet. Gurumayi put her hand on the top of my head and without her speaking, I heard her voice inside of me saying, “When are you going to understand that I am always with you?”
I woke up the next morning, deeply touched by what had happened and immensely grateful to Gurumayi for answering my prayer. I knew my darshan with Gurumayi had been real: Gurumayi had been there with me. She had shown me that we had never been separated—our love was perfect.
Gurumayi’s teaching became the strongest command I have ever received. I knew I had to follow this command. And so, during meditation one morning, I prayed that as I went about my day, I would keep, in my heart and mind, the knowledge that Gurumayi is always with me. This prayer has become a part of my regular practice. When I keep this awareness, everything in my daily life seems to align. There is a constant flow of love between Gurumayi and me, and that love flows out to people around me—to my patients, friends, and everyone I meet. Even when I am sitting by myself, I feel totally connected to this love, and it fills me with deep contentment.
Gurumayi has brought me to a greater understanding of that Sufi saying my father had taught me so many years ago: A great being nourishes, sustains, and protects the world by his or her own presence and perfect love. The Guru’s presence is everywhere, and that is how the Guru nourishes and protects the world. That is how the Guru nourishes and protects me, no matter how close or far away we are physically.
I understand now that Gurumayi is inviting me to let go of my sense of separateness and enter into that state of perfect union in which she lives all the time.
I am deeply grateful to my beloved Gurumayi for nourishing and protecting me in this way. This Guru-disciple relationship is the most precious part of my life—it is what sustains me.
Khadija Laghrani Sharp began her Siddha Yoga practice in Bordeaux, France in 1983. She has offeredseva as a Siddha Yoga meditation teacher in satsangs, Shaktipat Intensives, and Family Retreats in France. She has also served as a mentor and caretaker in the Taruna Poshana department at Shree Muktananda Ashram. Khadija is a gynecologist and homeopath, with five medical degrees from Bordeaux University. She lives in Bordeaux with her husband, Rudra.

I was born in Casablanca, Morocco. I grew up in a Muslim family, in a very spiritual atmosphere. My father followed the Sufi path and he used to tell me this Sufi saying: A great being nourishes, sustains, and protects the world by his or her own presence and perfect love. As a child I cherished this saying and kept it close to my heart. I focused on these two words: nourishes and protects. I remembered them often, especially when I was scared or going through a difficult time.
I first came across the Siddha Yoga path in 1983, when I was a medical student at the University of Bordeaux, in France. The year before that I had begun to feel a burning desire to know God. It was a hunger: I wanted to be spiritually nourished. This longing made me very aware that I needed someone who had fully mastered the subject, someone who could teach me in a clear and specific way how to know God.
In February 1983, after participating in a conference about Siddha Yoga meditation held at my university, I knew I had found my Master: Gurumayi Chidvilasananda.
In the years that followed, I experienced tremendous grace in studying Gurumayi’s teachings. I remember spending evenings after class reading Siddha Yoga books, and they truly fed me and gave me all that I needed; I felt nourished. The teachings helped me come closer to my goal of knowing God. And they helped me build a strong relationship with Gurumayi.
My relationship with Gurumayi deepened over those early years. Then, in 1987 in Paris, I attended my first satsang with Gurumayi, when she was on a Teachings Visit in Europe. What I remember most about receiving Gurumayi’s darshan that day was the joy and happy tears that came up so naturally. After receiving Gurumayi’s darshan, I became very involved in offering seva in the Siddha Yoga Meditation Center in Bordeaux, especially in the satsangs and the broadcast Shaktipat Intensives.
For many summers I visited Shree Muktananda Ashram with other Siddha Yogis from France to participate in center leader trainings and other courses. Although the visits during my summer vacation time were very short, they were incredible. During the rest of the year, since I lived in France, there was a geographic distance between my Guru and me. It did not matter, though—Gurumayi’s teachings brought her close to me.
Then, in 2001, as I went about my busy life with a big patient list and a successful clinic, I began to notice a shift within my being. By this point it had been a few years since I had seen Gurumayi in person. When I focused on this inner shift, I recognized it as a strong desire to have Gurumayi’s darshan once again, and to be in her physical presence. I started thinking of her and missing her a lot. This longing had a quality of both sweetness and burning desire—and it was constant.
This yearning to be near Gurumayi continued—until one night when I had a dream of Gurumayi. In the dream, I was in a big meditation hall. I was all by myself, sitting on the floor, facing the pictures of the Siddha Yoga Gurus on the puja. I was praying intensely to Gurumayi, when a door on the side of the hall opened, and there she was! Gurumayi walked in—silent, majestic, radiant, and surrounded by a magnificent golden light. I felt overwhelmed by the power of her presence. When she reached my seat, she stopped. I could feel the waves of her shakti so strongly that I couldn’t even look up at her. I kept my eyes on her feet. Gurumayi put her hand on the top of my head and without her speaking, I heard her voice inside of me saying, “When are you going to understand that I am always with you?”
I woke up the next morning, deeply touched by what had happened and immensely grateful to Gurumayi for answering my prayer. I knew my darshan with Gurumayi had been real: Gurumayi had been there with me. She had shown me that we had never been separated—our love was perfect.
Gurumayi’s teaching became the strongest command I have ever received. I knew I had to follow this command. And so, during meditation one morning, I prayed that as I went about my day, I would keep, in my heart and mind, the knowledge that Gurumayi is always with me. This prayer has become a part of my regular practice. When I keep this awareness, everything in my daily life seems to align. There is a constant flow of love between Gurumayi and me, and that love flows out to people around me—to my patients, friends, and everyone I meet. Even when I am sitting by myself, I feel totally connected to this love, and it fills me with deep contentment.
Gurumayi has brought me to a greater understanding of that Sufi saying my father had taught me so many years ago: A great being nourishes, sustains, and protects the world by his or her own presence and perfect love. The Guru’s presence is everywhere, and that is how the Guru nourishes and protects the world. That is how the Guru nourishes and protects me, no matter how close or far away we are physically.
I understand now that Gurumayi is inviting me to let go of my sense of separateness and enter into that state of perfect union in which she lives all the time.
I am deeply grateful to my beloved Gurumayi for nourishing and protecting me in this way. This Guru-disciple relationship is the most precious part of my life—it is what sustains me.
Khadija Laghrani Sharp began her Siddha Yoga practice in Bordeaux, France in 1983. She has offeredseva as a Siddha Yoga meditation teacher in satsangs, Shaktipat Intensives, and Family Retreats in France. She has also served as a mentor and caretaker in the Taruna Poshana department at Shree Muktananda Ashram. Khadija is a gynecologist and homeopath, with five medical degrees from Bordeaux University. She lives in Bordeaux with her husband, Rudra.

Ich wurde in Casablanca in Marokko geboren und wuchs in einer muslimischen Familie auf, in einer sehr spirituellen Atmosphäre. Mein Vater folgte dem Sufi-Weg und pflegte mir diesen Sufi-Satz zu sagen: Ein großes Wesen nährt, erhält und beschützt die Welt durch seine Gegenwart und vollkommene Liebe. Als Kind liebte ich diesen Spruch und trug ihn im Herzen. Ich konzentrierte mich auf diese beiden Wörter: nährt und beschützt. Ich erinnerte mich oft an sie, besonders wenn ich Angst hatte oder eine schwierige Zeit durchlebte.
Als ich 1983 an der Universität von Bordeaux in Frankreich Medizin studierte, kam ich zum ersten Mal mit dem Siddha Yoga Weg in Berührung. Im Jahr davor hatte ich angefangen, ein brennendes Verlangen nach der Erkenntnis Gottes zu spüren. Es war ein Hunger: Ich wollte spirituell genährt werden. Diese Sehnsucht machte mir deutlich bewusst, dass ich jemanden brauchte, der dieses Thema ganz und gar gemeistert hatte, jemanden, der mich klar und konkret lehren konnte, wie man Gott erkennt.
Nachdem ich im Februar 1983 in meiner Universität an einer Konferenz über Siddha Yoga Meditation teilgenommen hatte, wusste ich, dass ich meine Meisterin gefunden hatte: Gurumayi Chidvilasananda.
In den folgenden Jahren erfuhr ich enorme Gnade durch das Studium von Gurumayis Lehren. Ich erinnere mich, dass ich die Abende nach dem Unterricht mit dem Lesen von Siddha Yoga Büchern verbrachte, und sie stillten wirklich meinen Hunger und gaben mir alles, was ich brauchte. Ich fühlte mich genährt. Die Lehren halfen mir, meinem Ziel, Gott zu erkennen, näher zu kommen. Und sie halfen mir, eine starke Beziehung zu Gurumayi aufzubauen.
Meine Beziehung zu Gurumayi vertiefte sich im Laufe dieser frühen Jahre. Als Gurumayi dann im Jahr 1987 zu einem Lehr-Besuch in Europa war, besuchte ich in Paris meinen ersten satsang mit ihr. Was mir von Gurumayis darshan an jenem Tag am stärksten in Erinnerung geblieben ist, sind die Freude und die glücklichen Tränen, die so natürlich aufstiegen. Nachdem ich Gurumayis darsha erhalten hatte, engagierte ich mich sehr in der seva im Siddha Yoga Meditationscenter in Bordeaux, besonders in satsangs und bei den Live-Übertragungen von Shaktipat Intensives.
Viele Sommer lang besuchte ich den Shree Muktananda Ashram mit anderen Siddha Yogis aus Frankreich, um an Trainings für Centerleiter/innen und anderen Kursen teilzunehmen. Obwohl die Besuche während meiner Sommerferien sehr kurz waren, waren sie unglaublich. Da ich in Frankreich lebte, gab es in der restlichen Zeit des Jahres eine räumliche Distanz zwischen meinem Guru und mir. Aber das spielte keine Rolle – Gurumayis Lehren brachten sie mir ganz nahe.
Dann, im Jahre 2001 – mein geschäftiges Leben war mit einer großen Patientenliste und einer erfolgreichen Praxis ausgefüllt – begann ich eine Veränderung im Inneren wahrzunehmen. Zu diesem Zeitpunkt hatte ich Gurumayi bereits ein paar Jahre lang nicht persönlich gesehen. Als ich mich auf diese innere Veränderung konzentrierte, erkannte ich darin das starke Verlangen, noch einmal Gurumayis darshan zu erleben und in ihrer physischen Gegenwart zu sein. Ich begann, an sie zu denken und sie sehr zu vermissen. Diese Sehnsucht trug sowohl eine Süße als auch ein brennendes Verlangen in sich – und sie war unentwegt präsent.
Dieses Verlangen nach Gurumayis Nähe hielt an – bis ich eines Nachts von Gurumayi träumte. Im Traum befand ich mich in einem großen Meditationssaal. Ich war ganz alleine dort und saß auf dem Boden vor den Bildern der Siddha Yoga Gurus auf der puja. Ich betete intensiv zu Gurumayi, als sich eine Tür auf der Seite des Raums öffnete, und da war sie! Gurumayi trat ein – ruhig, majestätisch, strahlend und von einem prachtvollen goldenen Licht umgeben. Ich war von der Kraft ihrer Gegenwart überwältigt. Als sie meinen Platz erreichte, hielt sie an. Die Wellen ihrer shakti waren so stark zu spüren, dass ich nicht einmal zu ihr hochsehen konnte. Ich hielt meinen Blick auf ihre Füße gerichtet. Gurumayi legte ihre Hand auf meinen Kopf, und ohne dass sie sprach, hörte ich ihre Stimme in meinem Innern sagen: „Wann wirst du verstehen, dass ich immer bei dir bin?“
Ich wachte am nächsten Morgen auf und war tief berührt von dem, was geschehen war, und Gurumayi sehr dankbar dafür, dass sie mein Gebet erhört hatte. Ich wusste, dass mein darshan mit Gurumayi wirklich stattgefunden hatte: Gurumayi war bei mir gewesen. Sie hatte mir gezeigt, dass wir niemals getrennt gewesen waren – unsere Liebe war vollkommen.
Gurumayis Lehre wurde der stärkste Befehl, den ich je erhalten hatte. Ich wusste, dass ich diesem Befehl folgen musste. Und deshalb betete ich eines Morgens in der Meditation, als ich meinen Tag begann, darum, ich möge mich im Laufe des Tages in Gedanken und im Herzen stets an das Wissen erinnern, dass Gurumayi immer bei mir ist. Dieses Gebet ist Teil meiner regelmäßigen Übung geworden. Wenn ich dieses Bewusstsein beibehalte, scheint alles in meinem Alltag an den richtigen Platz zu fallen. Es gibt einen konstanten Fluss der Liebe zwischen Gurumayi und mir, und diese Liebe fließt nach außen zu den Menschen um mich herum – zu meinen Patienten, zu meinen Freunden, zu jedem, dem ich begegne. Sogar wenn ich nur allein für mich dasitze, fühle ich mich vollkommen mit dieser Liebe verbunden, und sie erfüllt mich mit tiefer Zufriedenheit.
Gurumayi hat mich zu einem größeren Verständnis jenes Sufi-Satzes geführt, den mich mein Vater vor so vielen Jahren gelehrt hatte: Ein großes Wesen nährt, erhält und beschützt die Welt durch seine Gegenwart und vollkommene Liebe. Der Guru ist überall gegenwärtig, und auf diese Weise nährt und beschützt der Guru die Welt. Auf diese Weise nährt und beschützt der Guru auch mich, ganz gleich, wie nah oder fern wir einander körperlich sind.
Ich verstehe jetzt, dass Gurumayi mich auffordert, mein Gefühl von Getrenntheit loszulassen und in den Zustand völliger Einheit zu gelangen, in dem sie die ganze Zeit über lebt.
Ich bin meiner geliebten Gurumayi zutiefst dankbar dafür, dass sie mich auf diese Weise nährt und beschützt. Diese Guru-Schüler-Beziehung ist der wertvollste Teil meines Lebens – sie ist das, was mich erhält.
Khadija Laghrani Sharp begann 1983 in Bordeaux in Frankreich damit, Siddha Yoga Übungen zu praktizieren. Sie hat seva als Siddha Yoga Meditationslehrerin in satsangs, Shaktipat Intensives und Familienretreats in Frankreich angeboten. Sie hat auch als Mentorin und Betreuerin im Taruna Poshana Department im Shree Muktananda Ashram gedient. Khadija ist Gynäkologin und Homöopathin mit fünf Abschlüssen in Medizin von der Universität von Bordeaux. Sie lebt mit ihrem Ehemann Rudra in Bordeaux.

Sono nata a Casablanca, in Marocco. Sono cresciuta in una famiglia di fede musulmana, in un ambiente ricco di spiritualità. Mio padre, seguace del sentiero sufi, mi ripeteva spesso questo detto sufi: Un grande essere nutre, sostiene e protegge il mondo con la sua presenza e con il suo amore perfetto.
Da bambina amavo questo detto e lo custodivo nel mio cuore. Mi concentravo su queste due parole: nutre e protegge. Mi tornavano spesso in mente, specialmente quando avevo paura o attraversavo un periodo difficile.
Ho incrociato per la prima volta il sentiero Siddha Yoga nel 1983, mentre studiavo medicina all’università di Bordeaux, in Francia. In quel periodo avevo cominciato ad avere il bruciante desiderio di conoscere Dio. Ero come affamata: volevo essere nutrita spiritualmente. Questo intenso desiderare mi aveva reso acutamente consapevole di avere bisogno di incontrare qualcuno che padroneggiasse completamente la materia, qualcuno che potesse istruirmi in modo chiaro e preciso su come arrivare a conoscere Dio.
Dopo aver partecipato ad una conferenza sulla meditazione Siddha Yoga, tenuta nella mia università nel febbraio del 1983, ho avuto la certezza di aver trovato il mio Maestro: Gurumayi Chidvilasananda.
Negli anni seguenti, studiando gli insegnamenti di Gurumayi, ho fatto esperienza della strabiliante grazia del Guru. Ricordo come, al termine delle mie lezioni, trascorrevo intere serate a leggere i libri Siddha Yoga; mi cibavo, letteralmente, di queste letture. Mi davano tutto ciò di cui avevo bisogno: mi sentivo nutrita. Gli insegnamenti mi aiutavano ad avvicinarmi alla mia meta, alla conoscenza di Dio. E mi aiutavano a instaurare una forte relazione con Gurumayi.
La mia relazione con Gurumayi è diventata più profonda nel corso di quei primi anni. Poi, nel 1987 a Parigi ho preso parte al mio primo satsang con Gurumayi che si trovava in Europa per una Visita d’Insegnamento. Il ricordo più vivo che ho del giorno in cui ho ricevuto il darshan di Gurumayi, sono le lacrime di gioia e felicità che sgorgavano con tanta naturalezza dai miei occhi. Dopo aver ricevuto il darshan di Gurumayi, ho cominciato a dedicarmi alla pratica di offrire seva nel centro di meditazione Siddha Yoga di Bordeaux, specialmente durante i satsang e gli Intensivi Shaktipat trasmessi via satellite.
Ho visitato lo Shree Muktananda Ashram con altri Siddha Yogi francesi per molte estati, partecipando ai corsi su come dirigere un centro di meditazione Siddha Yoga e ad altri corsi. Queste visite che facevo usufruendo delle mie vacanze estive erano molto brevi, eppure erano incredibili. Durante il resto dell’anno esisteva un’effettiva distanza geografica fra il mio Guru e me, vivendo io in Francia, ma non aveva alcuna importanza: i suoi insegnamenti mi facevano sentire Gurumayi sempre vicina.
Poi, nel 2001, nella mia esistenza piena di impegni, tra lunghe liste di pazienti e un affermato studio medico, ho cominciato ad avvertire un sottile cambiamento dentro di me. Era ormai passato qualche anno dal giorno in cui avevo visto Gurumayi di persona. Ho osservato questo cambiamento più da vicino e ho capito che si trattava del forte desiderio di avere ancora una volta il darshan di Gurumayi, e di trovarmi di nuovo fisicamente alla sua presenza. Avevo cominciato a pensarla sempre e mi mancava moltissimo. Questa intensa nostalgia era fatta sia di dolcezza che di desiderio bruciante, e non mi lasciava mai.
Questo anelito struggente di essere vicina a Gurumayi è stato costante per tanto tempo. Poi una notte l'ho sognata. Nel sogno, io mi trovavo in una vasta sala di meditazione; ero tutta sola, seduta sul pavimento con il viso rivolto alle foto dei Guru del Siddha Yoga sulla puja. Mentre pregavo intensamente Gurumayi, una porta laterale della sala si è aperta, e lei era lì! Gurumayi è entrata nella sala, silenziosa, maestosa, radiosa e circondata da una magnifica luce dorata. Mi sono sentita sopraffatta della forza della sua presenza. Quando ha raggiunto il luogo dove io ero seduta, si è fermata; percepivo le ondate della sua shakti con una tale forza che non osavo sollevare lo sguardo su di lei. Continuavo a tenere gli occhi fissi sui suoi piedi. Gurumayi mi ha poggiato una mano sulla testa e io ho sentito la sua voce dentro di me, anche se lei non stava parlando: “Quand’è che finalmente capirai che io sono sempre con te?”
La mattina successiva mi sono svegliata profondamente commossa per quello che era successo e immensamente grata a Gurumayi per aver risposto alla mia preghiera. Sapevo che il darshan con Gurumayi era stato reale: Gurumayi era stata lì con me. Mi aveva mostrato che non eravamo mai state separate: il nostro amore era perfetto.
L’insegnamento di Gurumayi è diventato un comando, il più potente che io abbia mai ricevuto. Sapevo di dover seguire questo comando. Così, una mattina, durante la meditazione, ho formulato la preghiera di riuscire a mantenere nel mio cuore e nella mia mente, durante tutta la giornata, la comprensione che Gurumayi è sempre con me. Questa preghiera è diventata parte della mia pratica consueta. Quando mantengo questa consapevolezza, ogni cosa nella mia vita quotidiana sembra armonizzarsi. C’è un costante flusso di amore fra Gurumayi e me, e questo amore si riversa sulle persone intorno a me, sui miei pazienti, sugli amici e su chiunque incontri. Persino quando sono seduta per conto mio, mi sento totalmente connessa con questo amore, e ciò mi riempie di un profondo senso di appagamento.
Gurumayi mi ha portata a una maggiore comprensione di quel detto sufi che mio padre mi ha impartito tanti anni fa: Un grande essere nutre, sostiene e protegge il mondo con la sua presenza e con il suo amore perfetto. Il Guru è presente ovunque, ed è così che il Guru nutre e protegge il mondo. È così che il Guru mi nutre e mi protegge, sia che siamo vicine o fisicamente lontane.
Ora capisco che Gurumayi mi invita a dimenticare il mio senso di separatezza e a entrare in quello stato di unione perfetta in cui lei vive costantemente.
Sono profondamente grata alla mia amata Gurumayi che mi nutre e mi protegge in questo modo. La relazione Guru-discepolo è l'aspetto più prezioso della mia vita, è ciò che mi dà sostegno.
Khadija Laghrani Sharp ha iniziato la sua pratica Siddha Yoga a Bordeaux (Francia) nel 1983. Ha offerto seva come insegnante di meditazione Siddha Yoga nei satsang, negli Intensivi Shaktipat e nei Ritiri per famiglie in Francia. Ha offerto il suo servizio anche come mentore e custode nel dipartimento Taruna Poshana nello Shree Muktananda Ashram. Khadija è ginecologa e omeopata e ha conseguito cinque specializzazioni in medicina presso l’università di Bordeaux. Vive a Bordeaux con suo marito Rudra.

Nasci em Casablanca, Marrocos. Cresci numa família Muslim, numa atmosfera muito espiritual. Meu pai seguia o caminho Sufi e costumava me dizer o seguinte aforisma Sufi: Um grande ser nutre, sustenta e protege o mundo pela sua própria presença e perfeito amor. Quando criança, eu apreciava este aforisma e o mantinha próximo ao coração. Eu focava nestas duas palavras: nutre e protege. Lembrava-me delas com frequência, especialmente quando estava assustada ou atravessava um momento difícil.
Encontrei o caminho de Siddha Yoga pela primeira vez em 1983, quando era estudante de medicina na Universidade de Bordeaux, na França. No ano anterior eu tinha começado a sentir um desejo ardente de conhecer a Deus. Era como uma fome: eu queria ser espiritualmente nutrida. Este desejo me tornou muito consciente da minha necessidade de encontrar alguém que tivesse dominado completamente este assunto, alguém que pudesse me ensinar de modo claro e específico como conhecer a Deus.
Em fevereiro de 1983, depois de participar de uma conferência na minha universidade sobre meditação Siddha Yoga, soube que tinha encontrado meu Mestre: Gurumayi Chidvilasananda.
Nos anos que se seguiram, experimentei uma incrível graça ao estudar os ensinamentos de Gurumayi. Lembro-me de dedicar as noites depois das aulas à leitura de livros Siddha Yoga, e eles realmente me alimentaram e me deram tudo o que eu precisava; sentia-me nutrida. Os ensinamentos me ajudaram a me aproximar do meu objetivo de conhecer a Deus. E me ajudaram a construir uma forte relação com Gurumayi.
Minha relação com Gurumayi aprofundou-se durante aqueles precoces anos. Então, em 1987 em Paris, participei do meu primeiro satsang com Gurumayi, quando ela estava numa Visita de Ensinamentos na Europa. Do que mais me lembro sobre o darshan com Gurumayi naquele dia é da alegria e das lágrimas de felicidade que surgiram tão naturalmente. Depois de receber darshan de Gurumayi, fiquei muito envolvida em oferecer seva no centro de Meditação Siddha Yoga em Bordeaux, especialmente nos satsangs e Intensivos Shaktipat.
Por muitos verões visitei o Ashram Shree Muktananda com outros Siddha Yogues da França para participar em treinamentos de liderança e outros cursos. Apesar das visitas durante minhas férias de verão serem muito curtas, elas eram incríveis. Durante o restante do ano, já que eu vivia na França, havia uma distância geográfica entre meu Guru e eu. Contudo, isto não era importante — os ensinamentos de Gurumayi a traziam para perto de mim.
Então, em 2001, enquanto eu seguia minha vida muito ocupada com uma longa lista de pacientes e sucesso na atividade clínica, comecei a notar uma mudança dentro do meu ser. Naquela época, fazia alguns anos que eu não me encontrava pessoalmente com Gurumayi. Quando me foquei nesta mudança interior, a reconheci como um forte desejo de ter darshan de Gurumayi novamente, e de estar na sua presença física. Comecei a pensar muito nela e sentir muito sua falta. Este desejo era ao mesmo tempo doce e ardente—e era constante.
Esta vontade de estar perto de Gurumayi continuou—até uma noite em que sonhei com Gurumayi. No sonho, eu estava numa grande sala de meditação. Estava sozinha, sentada no chão, na frente das fotos dos Gurus Siddha Yoga no puja. Eu rezava intensamente para Gurumayi, quando uma porta em um dos lados da sala se abriu, e lá estava ela! Gurumayi entrou—silenciosa, majestosa, radiante, e circundada por uma magnífica luz dourada. Fiquei impressionada pelo poder da sua presença. Quando ela chegou onde eu estava sentada, parou. Eu podia sentir tão forte as ondas da sua shakti que não podia nem olhar para ela. Mantive os olhos nos seus pés. Gurumayi pos sua mão sobre minha cabeça e, sem falar, pude ouvir sua voz dentro de mim dizer: “Quando você vai entender que estou sempre com você?”
Acordei na manhã seguinte, profundamente tocada pelo que tinha acontecido e imensamente agradecida a Gurumayi por responder à minha prece. Eu sabia que meu darshan com Gurumayi tinha sido real: Gurumayi tinha estado ali comigo. Ela me mostrou que nunca tínhamos estado separadas—nosso amor era perfeito.
O ensinamento de Gurumayi se tornou o mais forte comando que eu jamais tivera recebido. Eu sabia que tinha que seguir este comando. E então, numa manhã, durante a meditação, pedi que, enquanto o meu dia fosse avançando, eu mantivesse, no meu coração e na minha mente, o conhecimento de que Gurumayi estava sempre comigo. Esta prece tornou-se parte da minha prática regular. Quando mantenho esta consciência, tudo na minha vida parece se alinhar. Há um fluxo constante de amor entre Gurumayi e eu, e este amor flui para as pessoas ao meu redor—meus pacientes, amigos e todas as pessoas que encontro. Mesmo quando estou sentada sozinha, sinto-me totalmente conectada a este amor, e isto me preenche com profundo contentamento.
Gurumayi trouxe-me um entendimento maior daquele aforisma Sufi que meu pai me ensinou há tantos anos: Um grande ser nutre, sustenta e protege o mundo pela sua própria presença e perfeito amor. A presença do Guru está em toda a parte, e é assim que o Guru nutre e protege o mundo. É assim que o Guru me nutre e protege, não importando se estamos fisicamente próximos ou distantes.
Entendo agora que Gurumayi está me convidando a deixar meu senso de separação e a entrar naquele estado de perfeita união em que ela vive o tempo todo.
Sou profundamente grata à minha amada Gurumayi por me nutrir e proteger desta maneira. Esta relação Guru-discípulo é a parte mais preciosa da minha vida—é o que me sustenta.
Khadija Laghrani Sharp começou sua prática Siddha Yoga em Bordeaux, France, em 1983. Ela ofereceu seva como professora de meditação Siddha Yoga em satsangs, Intensivos Shaktipat e Retiros de Família na França. Ela também serviu como mentora e cuidadora no departamento Taruna Poshana no Ashram Shree Muktananda. Khadija é ginecologista e homeopata, com cinco graduações médicas da Universidade de Bordeaux. Ela vive em Bordeaux com seu marido, Rudra.

Je suis née à Casablanca, au Maroc. J’ai grandi dans une famille musulmane, dans une atmosphère très spirituelle. Mon père suivait la voie soufie et il avait pour habitude de me répéter ce proverbe soufi : Un grand être nourrit, soutient et protège le monde par sa seule présence et son amour parfait. Enfant, je chérissais ce proverbe et le gardais serré contre mon cœur. Je me concentrais sur ces deux mots : nourrit et protège. Je me les rappelais souvent, particulièrement lorsque j’étais effrayée ou quand je traversais une période difficile.
J’ai découvert la voie du Siddha Yoga en 1983, lorsque j’étais étudiante en médecine à l’université de Bordeaux, en France. L’année précédente, je m’étais mise à ressentir le désir brûlant de connaître Dieu. C’était une soif ardente : je voulais être nourrie spirituellement. Ce désir me fit prendre conscience que j’avais besoin de quelqu’un qui avait complètement maîtrisé le sujet, quelqu’un qui m’enseignerait de façon claire et spécifique comment connaître Dieu.
En février 1983, après avoir participé à une conférence sur la méditation du Siddha Yoga qui se tenait dans mon université, je sus que j’avais trouvé mon Maître : Gurumayi Chidvilasananda.
Les années qui suivirent, je fis l’expérience d’une grâce incroyable en étudiant les enseignements de Gurumayi. Je me souviens avoir passé des soirées après les cours à lire les livres du Siddha Yoga ; ils me sustentaient vraiment et me donnaient tout ce dont j’avais besoin, je me sentais nourrie. Les enseignements m’ont aidée à m’approcher de mon but : connaître Dieu. Et ils m’ont aidée à établir une relation solide avec Gurumayi.
Ma relation à Gurumayi s’est approfondie au cours de ces premières années. Puis, en 1987, à Paris, j’ai participé à mon premier satsang avec Gurumayi qui faisait une tournée d’enseignement en Europe. Ce dont je me souviens le mieux lorsque je reçus le darshan de Gurumayi ce jour-là , c’était la joie et les larmes de bonheur qui ont surgi si spontanément. Après avoir reçu le darshan de Gurumayi, je me suis beaucoup impliquée en offrant de la seva au Centre de méditation Siddha Yoga, à Bordeaux, particulièrement pour les satsang et les Intensives Shaktipat retransmises.
Pendant de nombreux étés, je suis venue à Shree Muktananda Ashram avec d’autres Siddha Yogis français pour suivre des formations pour les responsables de centres et d’autres cours. Mes séjours pendant mes congés d’été étaient très brefs, cependant ils étaient incroyables. Le reste de l’année, du fait que je vivais en France, il y avait une distance géographique entre mon Guru et moi. Mais cela n’avait pas d’importance – les enseignements de Gurumayi la rapprochaient de moi.
Puis, en 2001, alors que je vaquais à mes nombreuses occupations, avec une liste de patients énorme et la charge d’une clinique prospère, j’ai commencé à remarquer un changement en moi-même. Cela faisait quelques années que je n’avais pas vu Gurumayi en personne. Lorsque je me suis concentrée sur ce changement intérieur, je l’ai identifié comme un désir intense d’avoir le darshan de Gurumayi une fois de plus et d’être en sa présence physique. Je me suis mise à penser à elle et elle me manquait beaucoup. Cette aspiration avait une empreinte à la fois de douceur et de désir ardent – et elle était constante.
Ce désir ardent d’être près de Gurumayi demeura – lorsqu’une nuit, je fis un rêve de Gurumayi. Dans le rêve, je me tenais dans une grande salle de méditation. J’étais toute seule, assise par terre, face aux portraits des Gurus du Siddha Yoga posés sur la puja. J’étais en train de prier Gurumayi intensément quand une porte latérale de la salle s’ouvrit : c’était elle ! Gurumayi entra – silencieuse, majestueuse, rayonnante, irradiant une lumière dorée magnifique. J’étais submergée par la puissance de sa présence. Arrivée à mon niveau, elle s’arrêta. Je sentais les vagues de sa shakti si puissamment que je ne pus même pas lever les yeux vers elle. Mon regard restait fixé sur ses pieds. Gurumayi posa la main sur le sommet de ma tête et sans qu’elle ne prononce un mot, j’entendis sa voix me dire intérieurement : « Quand donc vas-tu comprendre que je suis toujours avec toi ? »
Je me suis réveillée le lendemain, profondément touchée par ce qui s’était passé et infiniment reconnaissante envers Gurumayi d’avoir répondu à ma prière. Je savais que mon darshan avec Gurumayi avait été réel : Gurumayi avait bien été là avec moi.
L’enseignement de Gurumayi devint l’instruction la plus puissante que j’aie jamais reçue. Je savais qu’il me fallait suivre cette instruction. Ainsi, un matin, pendant la méditation, j’ai prié pour que, tout au long de la journée, je garde dans mon cœur et à l’esprit, la conscience que Gurumayi est toujours avec moi. Cette prière fait partie désormais de ma pratique régulière. Lorsque je maintiens cette conscience, tout dans ma vie quotidienne semble s’aligner. Il y a un flot constant d’amour entre Gurumayi et moi, et cet amour s’épanche vers les gens autour de moi – mes patients, amis, et chaque personne que je rencontre. Même lorsque je suis assise seule, je me sens entièrement reliée à cet amour, et il me remplit de contentement.
Gurumayi m’a amenée à une compréhension plus fine de ce proverbe soufi que mon père m’avait enseigné il y a de si nombreuses années: Un grand être nourrit, soutient et protège le monde par sa seule présence et son amour parfait. La présence du Guru est partout, et c’est ainsi que le Guru nourrit et protège le monde. C’est ainsi que le Guru me nourrit et me protège, que nous soyons près ou loin physiquement l’une de l’autre.
Ce que je comprends maintenant, c’est que Gurumayi m’invite à laisser tomber mon sens de la séparation et à entrer dans cet état d’union parfaite dans lequel elle vit continuellement.
Je suis profondément reconnaissante envers ma Gurumayi bien-aimée de m’avoir nourrie et protégée de cette façon. Cette relation Guru-disciple est ce qu’il y a de plus précieux dans ma vie – c’est ce qui me soutient.
Khadija Laghrani Sharp a commencé à pratiquer le Siddha Yoga à Bordeaux, en France, en 1983. Elle a offert de la seva en tant qu’enseignante de méditation Siddha Yoga dans les satsangs, les Intensives Shaktipat et les Retraites de familles en France. Elle offre également son service comme mentor et assistante dans le département Taruna Poshana à Shree Muktananda Ashram. Khadija est gynécologue et homéopathe; elle est diplômée de l’Université de Bordeaux, avec cinq spécialités. Elle vit à Bordeaux avec son époux, Rudra.
Reading Khadija’s Reflection on Gurumayi gave me a new understanding: that what I’ve been looking for on the outside is already available for me on the inside. As I experienced this, my heart warmed with love and devotion for my Guru, and I felt serene and at peace.
Rome, Italy
This online satsang enables me to be in touch with the sangham, as there is no Siddha Yoga meditation center nearby. As I read the Reflections and shares by fellow disciples treading the Siddha Yoga path, I am filled with gratitude for the way that Siddha Yoga is reaching us throughout the world.
Wellington, India
In the past when I have felt the physical distance separating me from Gurumayi, I would ask for darshan during my meditation and dreams. When I did receive darshan in those ways, I would think Gurumayi had come to me. But now I understand that there is no coming and going. Gurumayi is always within me, lives in me as my own Self.
I am going to incorporate Khadija’s practice of saying “Gurumayi is always with me” throughout my day.
New York, United States
When I arrived at the description of the dream, I too was overwhelmed by the compassion of our beloved Guru, Gurumayi.
Rome, Italy
It has special resonance for me today. I woke up after dreaming about being in Shree Muktananda Ashram, went to my window, and looked out at this beautiful day. Spontaneously, I said, “Thank you, Gurumayi. I feel you in every part of my being right now. I see you in everything.” I did not plan on those words—they came out in a flow of gratitude.
After twenty-four years as a student of Siddha Yoga, I am finally getting this core teaching: there is no distance between myself and Gurumayi.
New York, United States
This Reflection affirms my understanding of the value of living with the constant awareness of the Guru inside us, the Guru who unceasingly guides us from within. I am grateful for Gurumayi’s love and guidance. And I am grateful for the Reflections and shares from the Siddha Yoga sangham, which keep us all connected with the experience of Birthday Bliss.
Chennai, India
During the Birthday Bliss month, I feel even closer to Gurumayi. It seems that every hour of my day is colored by Gurumayi’s presence. As I walked through the art galleries at Tate Modern here in London the other day, drinking in the glorious colors of Henri Matisse’s cutouts, I thought, “Oh Gurumayi, I wish you could see this!” In that moment of sheer joy, I realized she was beside me, making my enjoyment and enthusiasm so much greater.
London, United Kingdom
Massachusetts, United States
It is so inspiring to read how Siddha Yoga students all around the world are sharing the Guru’s love by taking the lessons they learned when they spent time offering seva and applying them in their daily lives in so many different ways and for the benefit of others.
It feels as though Gurumayi has created an invisible string of lights which extends around the world, and through the Siddha Yoga teachings and practices, we can become beacons that reflect the Guru’s light.
London, United Kingdom
Katzenbach, Germany
Massachusetts, United States