For the past year I have had a burning desire for a particular situation to occur in my life. I persisted in pursuing this goal as my ego kept wanting and wanting and wanting. I also dragged other people into my drama. Finally I had to realize that this situation I had so craved was not going to happen, which forced me to recalibrate.
It feels as if Gurumayi’s grace pressed the pause button for me, and it feels so wonderful to be free from this all-consuming desire. I sent out prayers for forgiveness to those I had involved in my drama.
None of these realizations would have occurred had I not studied Gurumayi’s teaching in “Developing, Pausing, Ascending…” as a daily practice. Now there is room in my heart to be grateful for what I have and to make better use of the time I have to continue my sadhana and dissolve into stillness. As always, Gurumayi’s guidance will be my anchor.
New Hampshire, United States
“Developing, Pausing, Ascending…” came at a time when I was recognizing the onset of burnout from my daily work. So with great relief I started to implement Gurumayi’s guidance to pause.
As I started to settle into pausing as a practice, I noticed that my pausing had a superficial quality to it. I was not fully engaged with it, physically or mentally. It didn’t feel like a one-hundred-percent embodied pause!
So I made an effort to give undivided attention to my pausing—casting away any subtle, habitual tendency toward busyness; I took firm and loving hold of the mantra
Om Namah Shivaya.
Paying attention to the quality of my pausing at this deeper level helps me return to a quiet state more easily through the day. As I actively seek rejuvenation, I make time for pauses and rest in the spiritual realm.
I can now experience Gurumayi’s words: “The more attuned you are to pausing, the more you will ascend. The more you ascend, the deeper and richer your experiences of pausing will be.”
Guildford, United Kingdom
Patience has long been under cultivation in my life. Gurumayi’s teachings on patience have been with me step by step, and these new teachings have opened yet more space in which I can allow patience to grow. These words of Gurumayi especially caught my attention: “I take delight in how my breath naturally pauses before rising again and recommencing its activity." These words opened a new understanding of how I have tended to do my
sadhana as if I alone can make it happen—trying and trying, making effort upon effort, as if I have to even make the effort to breathe. I have been forgetting that each breath is in fact a gift. Pausing, I let myself be breathed, allowing for the possibility of delight to arise. And lo and behold, delight
did arise. The breath that came after a pause was simple, warming, comforting, and, yes, delightful.
Washington, United States
While reading Gurumayi’s teaching “Developing, Pausing, Ascending…,” I wondered how I might practice
sadhana “now,” in any given moment of my day. I did not realize at the time that even such gentle wondering can have the power of prayer, and just a few hours later I was graced with an insight. I had decided to pause for a moment and lie down in
shavasana in my sitting room when an insight arose: “Take time—a split second even—for your awareness to touch the Self, to touch the light, to touch the holy presence within.” While I have had this thought many times before, this time it did not have the quality of thought, but rather it felt like a ray of light.
Langwarrin, Australia
More and more, I feel the beckoning of deep peace, silence, and the pull inward. Remembering to turn inward, to do
mantra japa, to become aware of the breath is occurring for me over shorter intervals and lasting longer. Still, it is so easy to get distracted!
Sometimes it’s hard for me to imagine becoming permanently established in an inward focus. Even so, it makes sense that the inner Witness is the One watching my life, so perhaps continuous inner focus is the very thing going on all the time without my conscious awareness.
My attention was caught by Gurumayi’s three repetitions of “I am ready to ascend…” It’s like receiving permission from the highest authority, and that opens up some kind of new possibility for me. It is compelling, and I will continue to explore this.
West Vancouver, Canada
These teachings of Gurumayi about staying attuned to the “rhythm” of one’s sadhana are incredibly valuable to me!
I remember times when I have just let my boat drift in the ocean of life, and how hard it was for me when the waves bumped me up and down. However, I have decided to steer my boat myself—in the right direction and with regular strokes of the oars. This is why I experience contentment as a result.
In the moments when my oars do not touch the water and my boat continues to glide without effort, I take a pause, resting in silence from which I draw new strength and enthusiasm.
This steady interplay between self-effort and openness to grace carries me safely through my life. My efforts ground me and the practice of letting go and being open to grace makes me strong enough to master the big waves that can appear at any time.
Konolfingen, Switzerland
As I recited Gurumayi’s words at the end of the exquisite teachings in “Developing, Pausing, Ascending...,” repeating them once wasn’t enough! It only became enough when I had repeated, repeated, and repeated these words until I felt I had arrived at their meaning.
Pune, India
I meditated on Gurumayi’s words in this teaching. I spent time with each word and sentence. This turned out to be an ecstatic experience; I went into a great feeling. The words had so much meaning and resonance for me. I felt the Guru’s presence in a very real way. I could hear birds chirping outside my window, planes flying overhead, morning rush hour traffic blaring in the street below, and yet I remained indrawn. I saw Baba and flashes of blue. All of it was part and parcel of this mysterious meditation.
I followed Gurumayi’s guidance and “stayed with” this powerful experience. It was delicious. I feel like I am back on track in
sadhana.
New York, United States
I have often experienced what Gurumayi says in this teaching about the mantra being a “shield” and “armor.” Recently, I woke up at 2:00 a.m. troubled by the painful memory of a past event. I just couldn’t shake it out of my mind. But then I rose from my bed and went to my meditation room, where I repeated the mantra and meditated. This soothed my heart, and after a while the painful memory dissolved. After that, I was able to fall back into a peaceful sleep.
St. Laurent, Canada