Study Tools
Over the years, I have read this exposition many times. Each time my understanding and experience of mumukshutva, and my understanding that only the Self is the source of true happiness, deepen.
This morning, I remembered a moment when I was around six years old. I was climbing a spiral staircase with my mother. We were going to a spiritual bookstore. There was a skylight at the top of the stairs that emanated a most beautiful golden glow. When we got to the top and entered the bookstore, I remember thinking, “One day I will be able to read well enough to read all these books. Then I will know the Truth.”
I realize now that this was my first experience of mumukshutva, the longing that eventually brought me to Baba and Gurumayi and to the Siddha Yoga path. This understanding fills me with immense amazement and gratitude.
Hurlstone Park, Australia
After reading this exposition, I was transported back to when I was nine years old and first experienced intense fear: The vastness of the sky terrified me; the endlessness of the sea frightened me.
Over the years, I continued to have episodes of fear from time to time, yet I also felt a presence within me that guided and kept me company whenever they arose.
From meeting Gurumayi and doing sadhana, I came to understand the meaning behind my fears: The sky and the sea were reflecting my own inner vastness, and my body seemed too small to contain all of it.
At one point, Gurumayi explained that it was not anguish behind my fear, it was longing, and that this longing had brought me to the Guru. This completely transformed my understanding of my fear. Rather than a calamity, I began to view it as an opportunity.
My longing, my mumukshutva, had begun manifesting when I was just a child. I now feel that the guiding presence in my heart since childhood was Gurumayi. For this and so much more, I consider myself truly fortunate.
San Giorgio a Cremano, Italy
Reading Ben Williams’s exposition on mumukshutva has deepened my understanding of how my longing for liberation has evolved throughout my sadhana.
In 1991, I attended my first Siddha Yoga Shaktipat Intensive, knowing nothing about Gurumayi or the Siddha Yoga lineage. During meditation, I felt a feather gently touch my head. Later, I learned about the significance of peacock feathers and shaktipat. I knew I had found my Guru. Yet enlightenment seemed a distant goal. With four young children and an active life, how could I devote myself to the discipline I believed was required to attain liberation?
Over the years, I have come to recognize that the very circumstances I once considered obstacles to enlightenment were the fertile ground in which my sadhana could take root and flourish.
Today, I experience mumukshutva not only as a longing for liberation but also as a growing sense of inner freedom that brings renewed vitality and enthusiasm to my everyday life. The more I experience this freedom, the more deeply I am drawn to complete my sadhana.
Buenos Aires, Argentina
Every day when I wake up and open my eyes,
I am given the opportunity
To walk through my day with awareness,
As a yogi who recognizes God’s presence,
Within me and around me.
Or I can choose not to remember and immerse
Myself in the blinding fog of forgetfulness.
Every day, I can opt to cherish
The opportunity of a brand-new day—
To recognize God’s presence
In the beautiful voices of the birds singing outside,
To see God’s presence
In the clouds passing across the magnificent blue sky,
To fill my day with gratitude.
Or I can choose to go about my day
Without paying attention to
His divine manifestation.
Every day and every moment of my day
I get the opportunity
to be awake and recognize God’s presence,
Or not.
The effort is mine.
I can choose
To pay attention.
I feel the effects of grace showering upon me
When I choose wisely.
Cancun, Mexico
I understood from reflecting on this exposition that what inspires me to do the Siddha Yoga practices—meditating, reciting Shri Guru Gita, chanting, offering seva at the Siddha Yoga meditation center—is a deep “longing to be free,“ to attain moksha (liberation)!
St. Laurent, Canada
Every day of the thirty-eight years that I have been walking this path has revealed new facets for me to explore within myself: wonders to savor, things to let go of, steps forward to take, timeless moments, questions and answers, and perceptions of the divine presence. All of these have gradually sculpted and revealed the mumukshu I have become, yearning to unite my soul with the essence of meditation: supreme Consciousness.
I am immensely grateful for the power of transformation bestowed on me by my beloved Gurus’ immeasurable grace.
Plougonvelin, France
When I was about twelve years old, my mother took me to a religious ceremony for children. I loved the atmosphere of devotion and the fellowship of other children my age, but I found that some of the teachings presented there did not respect other faiths, and so I decided they were not true.
When my mother asked me if I would like to go again, I declined. A firm resolve arose inside me to search for the Truth with all my heart. And I knew the Truth would embody the knowledge that every soul is of equal value. When I met Baba and became familiar with the Siddha Yoga teachings, I knew that I had found what I had been seeking.
Vancouver, Canada
After reading this exposition, I became aware of the moment when I first experienced mumukshutva. This occurred many years ago when a health condition sent me to the emergency room, where I fell into a twenty-four-hour state of unconsciousness.
Upon regaining consciousness, my first request to my friend was, ”I want to join a meditation group. I want to meditate.” When I felt better, my friend brought me to Shri Gurumayi and the Siddha Yoga Meditation Center in Montreal.
This reminds me of a saying, “When the student is ready, the teacher appears.”
St. Laurent, Canada
Unfortunately, my mind then shifted to a difficult relationship I have with a family member. After experiencing anger, I decided to return to the website and read “The Longing to Be Free: Mumukshutva” with Om Gurudev playing in the background. While I was reading, I told myself, “But I am not this anger—quite the opposite!” and I tried to connect to my longing for joy, tranquility, and above all liberation. Listening to Om Gurudev makes me aware of what I really seek: to be immersed in love of the Guru, of God.
Now I feel detached from my anger, and it takes me less and less time for my vision to change and to feel my body vibrating with beneficial energy.
How many riches are contained in this website! I am increasingly grateful to receive these teachings when I need them most.
San Giorgio a Cremano, Italy
Today in the satsang I read some passages of this exposition to some inmate students. To listen to or to read the word freedom in this context stirs deep emotions. It’s so amazing to have the opportunity to share these inspiring teachings in a place without physical freedom. But at the same time all of us have to understand that the greatest freedom is inside.
At the end of the satsang I invited the participants to chant the name of Baba Muktananda, “the bliss of freedom.” I felt so much devotion, joy, and gratitude.
Turin, Italy
The first time that I saw Gurumayi, I recognized that it is indeed possible to attain the ultimate state of freedom. At that moment my soul was gripped by an enthusiasm that has never left me.
I prioritize the longing of my soul above all else. I have found that the sacrifices I make in order to do this are not heavy or sad. Instead, they are joyful, relieving, and fulfilling sacrifices. For example, I sacrifice indulgence and choose discipline, I sacrifice sadness and choose vigor, and I sacrifice worldly goals and choose spiritual ones.
Whenever I reflect on how many lives my soul has already lived through and how many times I have sought freedom, I am inspired to delve deeper into my sadhana. I realize that right now, in this life, is the best time for me to attain freedom. This knowledge fills me with a vibrant joy and a sense of deep gratitude for my beloved Guru who guides and uplifts me.
Konolfingen, Switzerland
Nashik, India
California, United States
Over the thirty-seven years I have been following the Siddha Yoga path, my life has become increasingly imbued with a refined, pure contentment as my thoughts and actions have come into alignment with my soul’s purest yearning—to know the Self.
Maryland, United States
Naturally my mind traveled to Ganeshpuri. I felt Bhagavan Nityananda’s presence around me, and I felt Gurumayi’s presence within. I repeated inwardly: I am the truth, I am the light, I am the Self, I am Consciousness and bliss, my body is your temple.
I felt every word reverberating in the core of my being. My longing to be in the presence of my Lord was so tangible that I felt I had become the Lord. I felt one with my Guru and all life forms around me. I felt liberated.
St Adèle, Canada
St. Lazare, Canada
Over the years, I have noticed that my detachment, discernment, and understanding are evolving. I am able to let go of old habits which don’t support my goal while welcoming new ones that bring about balance and harmony. With a constantly renewed awareness, I continue to find life enjoyable and engaging, and I keep enthusiasm in my heart.
Rodez, France
When I was fourteen, my mom went to a Siddha Yoga satsang for the first time. A few days later, a Siddha Yogi was over at our house, and my mom asked him to sing the chant from that week’s satsang.
I was standing in our living room, looking outside. As Mere Baba Muktananda filled the room, walls around my heart, which I didn’t even know existed, fractured and melted away. The world in front of me became translucent, backlit by a radiance filled with joy. Tears rolled down my checks, and I knew not why. One thought kept repeating, “It’s so beautiful.” It was a giant step forward in my journey toward the truth of who I am and the purpose of existence. I am forever grateful for my longing for liberation, and the answer to that longing.
Pennsylvania, United States
Connecticut, United States
Maryland, United States
Castlemaine, Australia
Kentucky, United States
I pray to have the strength to follow Gurumayi’s command to “be a mumukshu” in the true sense of the word, and become liberated in this very lifetime.
Udaipur, India
Gurumayi’s teaching “be a mumukshu” inspires me to practice her words as both an affirmation and a mantra as I continue my ascent towards that yearning.
New Jersey, United States
I feel that mumukshutva is my reason for living. And every effort I make to maintain this focus feels not like a sacrifice, but a grace-filled gift.
Gurumayi’s encouragement to “be a mumukshu” has taken permanent residence in my heart. I pray for it to come to full fruition in my being and in the hearts of all those who long for true freedom.
West Vancouver, Canada